Dan Seitz
Professional writer for Uproxx.com, GammaSquad.com, Guyspeak.com, Guyism.com, Zug.com, and innumerable other sites. He writes the Internet, basically.
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Vader Taken Out By Own Lightsaber, Dog
Darth Vader is lord of the Dark Side, second only to the Emperor in his power and command of the more dangerous side of the Force. This apparently means that he doesn't know which end of his lightsaber to use and can be taken down by an enthusiastic dog.
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DMX Remixed Into Reading Rainbow, Ruins Both [NSFW]
DMX is a hardcore gangsta rapper whose work largely defined early '00s rap and hip-hop. Reading Rainbow is a hardcore children's educational show whose work largely defined the childhood of millions.
And now some enterprising remixer has ruined both.
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This Cat Has Memorized Its Feeder Schedule Exactly
Cats are very, very attached to their food. It's just their way. And as any cat owner knows, it can be tricky to put a cat on a diet.
And if you do, you'll also have to figure out how to keep it from lurking around its food dish waiting for the timer to go off.
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Punching a 70-Year-Old Wal-Mart Cashier Is Just a Bad Idea
Wal-Mart can drive anyone over the edge. It's a huge place with lots of noise, sometimes surly employees, and always surly customers. On the other hand, Jacquetta Simmons let it get to her a little too much and she could spend seven years in jail because of it.
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Man Creates Horse Out of Glass… In Less Than a Minute
There are many talented artists out there, working in many mediums. Some take years to put together a life-like depiction of their subject.
Some are a bit quicker.
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Chuck Norris Shows The Angry Birds How To Do It
We've shown you Daneboe's summary of how Chuck Norris can beat Super Mario Bros. in less than twenty seconds.
But how will do against the pigs from "Angry Birds"?
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Here’s Two Minutes Of Animals Shaking Themselves Off
Ever wonder why animals shake themselves dry. Scientists were so curious they assembled a paper and lots of slow motion video of animals drying themselves off, from lions to sheep to rats.
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Meet The Woman Who Can Make A Sandwich With Her Feet
Tisha Unarmed is a YouTube channel about a young woman who has no arms and thus does everything with her feet. And we mean everything.
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Champion Slackliner Walks Between Two Semis
Volvo wanted to demonstrate how precise and easy to control their new line of semi tractor trailer trucks were. So they decided to do something completely insane: ask champion slackliner Faith Dickey to walk a line between two trucks as they sped down a highway... towards a tunnel that would snap her rope.
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Ninja Kittens Stalk Their Prey
There is no creature more fearsome in the wild than the giant cats. The tiger, the panther, the lion, all justly feared predators who strike with neither warning nor mercy.
These kittens, not so much. But the instincts are still there.