20 Hilariously Awful ‘Lois Lane’ Comic Book Covers

Gee, Lois, if you're stuck on what seems to be a well-engineered raft with some boxes and a radio, maybe you should try calling the Coast Guard instead of playing pranks on fish. Aquaman has enough to do.

We're not sure what makes this cover worse: the two women acting like they're 14, or the really disturbing crazy eyes on both of them. Seriously. Those are ax-murderin' eyes.

So, a Mexican stereotype has fooled Superman into leaving while Lois is tied to a target with a bunch of men in straw hats ready to throw normal-sized darts at her? This might be a bit of a troubling peek at this cover artist's psyche. Either that or he had some really good drugs.

Yeah, because Superman's never been turned into an old man. Or a baby. Or a dog. Or a midget. Or a horse. On the other hand, he's not exactly a nice guy, either, so maybe Lois is right here.

Or Superman is holding you upside down to mess with you, Lois. Which do you think is more likely?

"Quick, Lois! Abandon that child to the angry, rock-throwing mob!" Then again, Lois is the one dressing in a bad Halloween costume, so maybe the kid's better off.

Oh, you think this is bad? Check out the actual story in this issue. At least they meant well, but this is not the finest moment of race relations in comics.

Yeah, Lois, if you've decided to turn yourself invisible just to prove to some guy who won't date you that you're marriage material, you might want to review your priorities.

Comic book writers loved giving Lois superpowers in the old days, apparently because the idea of a woman having immense power was shocking and unexpected. But, of course, she always lost it by the end of the issue and Superman went on his merry way, avoiding matrimony yet again while Lois became a bitter crying shell of herself. And it was a comic aimed at kids. Hi-larious!

Yeah, Lana, we're sure a guy calling himself "Ideal Man" is a total dreamboat. He doesn't sound self-involved AT ALL.

So, you were going to turn Superman, and yourself, into teenagers and this would help you get married...how...precisely?

So, wait, he won't let go of his old girlfriends and this is somehow Lois' fault? We sure hope he pays for her therapy bills out of his Daily Planet salary.

What really makes this cover is how utterly oblivious the wedding party is to Lois' obvious misery. That and the fact that Clark Kent apparently married Lois without tipping her off about that little secret of his.

File this under "Things You Should Have Thought Of, and Things He Should've Brought Up."

The sad thing is that the 'Superman' villain Bizzaro means the opposite of what he says, so he's actually insulting her. Also, we like how it's bad for a woman to be smart, even if she happens to be a respected investigative journalist for a major metropolitan newspaper.

"I don't mind. I've just got to choke down this rage and self-hatred and keep knitting!" Also, that's Superman's cousin he's hugging, and it's just a little skeevy.

Seriously, that thing must weigh 50 pounds. That can't be healthy. Also, apparently Lois can pop rivet together a box with a speaker within a few minutes of something happening to her face. That's actually kind of awesome. Why does she need Superman again? Oh, right, sexism.

You know Superman is just doing this so when Lois changes her mind, he can be a total jerk about it.

Yeah, if a dude has a room with a gold bust of you, and a life-size photo of you two cuddling, and you're not dating, marrying him is about the last thing you want to do.

Yeah, he's really got a point there.