In this sidesplitting NSFW video courtesy of Funny or Die, Colonel Sanders (John Goodman) weighs in on the Chick-fil-A anti-gay drama with a simple message -- enjoy KFC because it's without a doubt "the gayest chicken around." Good enough for us. Let's eat!

"Let it be known that Colonel Sanders loves the gays!" says Goodman as the late chicken impresario. "Hell, I might even be gay." Then, to prove his point, Sanders has a quick listen to his favorite Bette Midler album and enthusiastically takes in a table dance from a naked man.

Although Sanders professes a deep abiding love for gay people, his affection doesn't seem to extend to other minorities.

"We all know that when it comes to the chicken of America, I prefer the white meat to the dark," he says ominously.

Nor does Sanders seem to hold his customers in high regard, referring to them as "just a bunch of big, old money mouths walking around, talking and eating."

Still, if you're gay, you could do worse than KFC. And besides, Sanders says, KFC meals come with bowls too. Beat that, Chick-fil-A!