It's hard to believe the Webby Awards are in their 16th year. Where were you in 1996? In a chat room? Wincing to the sound of your dial-up connection? Anyway, in this Funny or Die video, Webby Award host Patton Oswalt searches for the internet's first commenter who commented, "first."

We never really understood the "first!" phenomenon. Is there a scoring system we're unaware of? How many points do you get? Where's the scoreboard? Does it make you a master of discovery? Not a bad title to throw on the old resume.

Patton's portrayal of Donny "Diamond" Ruiz helps us understand to a certain extent, but we'd love to meet the people obsessed with being first, lock them in a room and have a "First Off" to see who can compile the most "firsts." Call it, "Firsts of Fury."

The Webby Awards go down May 21st at 5:30pm ET at WebbyAwards.com.