Chocolates and flowers are so passe. Why not do something your love will never forget this Valentine's Day?

New York's Bronx Zoo Name a Roach program offers love-struck people the opportunity to name a Madagascar hissing cockroach after that very special someone (who may not be much longer if you go through with this).

Yes, "for $10, we'll send your loved one a digital certificate to cherish for years to come, featuring the name of your Valentine's roach." It's the perfect gift if, you know, potatoes just don't adequately express how you feel.

It's just like the ol' visual -- Cupid slings his Raid-covered arrow right at her heart.

And if that doesn't properly convey how much your sweetie actually means to you, you can get a printed certificate, along with the aforementioned cliched chocolates, for $25.

And, no, the person you're naming the roach for will not get the creature.

The zoo has thousands of these roaches, or what it refers to as "misunderstood love bugs." Money spent on the program will go towards protecting them.

Of course, we can't help but think that if you've got 10 bucks to spend on the man or woman who gets your heart racing, there are probably better ways to do so.