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15 Back-to-School Sales That Guarantee an Awesome Semester

College Back to School
Troll.me

It’s time to head back to school…did you get all your supplies? You know, the knives and fake severed feet and pregnancy tests? These back-to-school specials are clearly for people who know how to live (or at least how to drink too much and make questionable decisions due to impaired judgment). 

One thing’s for certain — if you stocked up on all these sales, you’d have a semester you’d never forget (assuming you could remember it).

School? Must be time to stock up on crappy beer!

Bud
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Like, a lot of it.

Beers
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No seriously, a LOT.

Case of Beer
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You weren’t planning on drinking that much beer like a civilized person, were you? You’re going to need this stuff:

Beer Pong
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Don’t let yourself get distracted by classes! Have some XBox points!

XBox
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You’re also going to need knives. Big ones. Lots of ‘em.

Knives
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And probably some wine.

Wine
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College is fun. You know what’s not fun? Chlamydia and unintended pregnancies.

Trojan
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While we’re on the subject:

More Pregnancy Test
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Oooh! A 3-pack!

Pregnancy Test
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You know what goes great with having to buy a 3-pack of pregnancy tests? Margaritas.

Margarita
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These are like Capri Suns, but for grownups!

Wine Pouch
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It’s like they think all college students do is drink.

Liquor
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Seriously.

Rum
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Well, not *just* drink — apparently there’s also a great need for rubber severed feet. (WHAT???)

Severed Feet
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